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Home > Sex > Tips

Tips on teenagers

4 comments Send to friend

08 September 2008

  • Really listen to what your teenager has to say and actively acknowledge the feelings on both sides.


  • Remember to acknowledge their point of view even if they don’t necessarily share it.


  • Try to keep things in perspective. Decide what is important and what is less important and expect to be challenged.


  • Your relationship with your child is changing. They are becoming young adults. Try to speak to them as young adults rather than ‘children’.


  • Send plenty of strong messages of thanks and appreciation.


  • Show an interest in what your teenager is doing at school and out of school but don’t pry into their personal lives.


  • Sometimes it’s best to agree to disagree over the values behind a conflict, but you can agree to changes in behaviour.


  • Avoid using labels as they can be very damaging to your child’s self-esteem. The need to fulfil even positive labels can be carried like a weight around the neck into adult life.


  • Teenagers need freedom so they can learn to take responsibility for themselves but they still need to boundaries which show them that you care.


  • Changing bodies and strange feelings and thoughts can leave a teenager feeling very self-conscious, so their space and privacy is important.


  • Remember to look after yourself and recharge your battery in order to continue doing the job of parenting.


  • Don’t be afraid of seeking help if necessary.


  • Try to have general chats with friends and relatives who also have teenagers – you may pick up some useful ideas.


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    Comments



    1. On 17 February 2009 19:26, mamm wrote:

    The 1st 3 points of this have hit a nerve with me. Im waitingfor my 13 yr old Daughter to return from the cinema and am going to have a showdown over texts Ive read on her phone. I feel a lot calmer and am trying to put things into perspective after reading the messages on this site. Thank you. x

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    2. On 18 May 2009 11:10, lilyskid52 wrote:

    OH I so needed all that advice !! It is hard to 'let go' after all those years of looking after them,It will take me some time to see her as the 16yr old young lady that she now is ,but I am determined to succeed

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    3. On 01 October 2009 22:29, Bubbly99 wrote:

    Please don't read your child's texts - they need privacy and will not appreciate you mistrusting them or their behaviour away from you. It is not easy to step back and give them space. If you have given them the right tools for living, they will do the right thing.

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    4. On 29 April 2010 15:13, stellastarr wrote:

    I would read my 13 year old's texts sometimes as at that age they still need a bit of "looking after", but to my 16 year old I would give more privacy and hope that she would not abuse the trust I place in her as an older teen.

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